im officially missing you. :(

today, i lost another friend. my neighbour actually, shahnaz fadhli.he was a good person, and one ambitious guy. you'll always be remembered. al-fatihah.
it hit me, how easily god will take ones life, either you are young or old. you will never know when your time comes.*sigh*

i lost a few friends too throughout my living life,al-fatihah to them too.

Arwah Hani
Arwah Nazirul Izwan
Arwah Farhan
Arwah Syafiq Latiff

and my uncle

Arwah Adnan Hj Abdullah

may your souls rest in peace.my prayers are with you.

Amin.

<3

since im currently job-lessss, all i can do is dream on getting this ,this or this and that! hahhaa.

currently drooling over ;

2009 has ended. toughest year i must say.
i struggled a lot to complete my dip in ID. i failed one subject, i took the supplement paper.

well,
HAPPY NEW YEAR FRIENDS!
hope 2010 will bring happiness and loads of luck for you guys.

wishlist for 2010. i dont really trust myself with resolution. so yeah, no resolution this year!

; find myself a decent job with nice salary.
; get myself a car.
; building up xxshoplette.
; sidekick 2008! A MUST!
; to futher my studies.
; get more handbags! heee
; get a macbook.


looking forward at the end of january :



+white eyelet dress from room8008.blogspot.com

+bb skin from ebay.



+(kecik's) aluminium bullet from ebay.

another 4 months plus to 5 year anniversary,and here i am writting how much i hated this relationship but i still want to fix things up. i dont know whether im being ridiculous or stupid or just another brillirant girl. but i know i cant do anything. i dont have the will power.

its his ego tht im pissed at.its his stupid thinking way tht i hate.

and now, im starting to hate on wht im blogging.

weee. im free from uitm. erk. i guess. if i clear all my papers la. i'll be missing perak a lot. trust me, especially my friends. those kind of friends are hard to get, they will always be there when you need them. when im hungry, when im sick, when i need extra hands with my work, they were there, to make sure im okay and go along this semester.

anyway, yes! ID is f* over man, now, im still not sure, whether to continue my degree or just work first. im tired of ID actually, its f* exhausting. im done with struggling, and im done chasing time.i need something that ease my mind. so yeah. no more ID. for nw.

actually im googling for scholarships now. I'll only continue my degree if daddy agrees to let me futher my studies.if not. the answer is no. but masscommunication is, acceptable. i actually had a fight with daddy because of this. he wanted me to take international business, where i hated accounts.isyk.

am,
im not sure if you'll read this. because you rarely read my blog. i just want you to know that right now i'm missing you,very much. being away doesnt mean the heart will be to. i just need the time,at this particular moment, dont ask why, because i don't know the answer to that question. you may say its crap,but that is what the hearts wants. im not trying to be corny or so, i just want you to know why im being a total selfish. i know im not supposed to do this to you since you dont have any wrongs,and you didnt do anything to hurt me. i just need to find myself now. im struggling day and night to make sure that i'll grad successfully this semester. maybe thats what've been bothering me lately. im scared.im scared. and you're rarely there to comfort me. you sleep when im working and you woke up when im sleeping. MAYBE you're not in pain. but i am. am, i'll be back on the 23rd if everything is okay.you'll wait dont you? i miss you. i really do, you must be wondering why i didnt call you or text you. it was never my intention to hurt you neither pissing you off. i just want to make sure you'll miss me as much as i missed you.so many things to write about how i feel am, but so little time, i need to attend to my assignments now. submission kejap lagi. i havent slept for 3 days. if you do care, just letting you know how am i doing now. i need to be infront the plot shop tomorrow early in the morning. take care. i love you baby. faz takde cdt sayang nak call, faz takde duit. nantilah kay?i'll call you when the time is right. kalau call sekarang mesti asyik gaduh, sebab faz punye otak tgh serabut. faz tak nak. nak hug! ;( rindu sangat. isyk .